You Are Jeff Bezos
"i've never felt so intensely attacked and upset and downright disrespected by a game" - @schizothymous
A simple text-based adventure exploring the age-old question: What would you do if you had more money than any single human being should ever have?
Be sure to expand the side column using the arrow in the upper left to view your current funds.
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PRAISE(?) FOR YOU ARE JEFF BEZOS
"Puts the wealth of the world's richest into dizzying perspective." -Vice Motherboard
"The options are stark reminders of public good we forsake in refusing to redistribute wealth." -Newsweek
"Takes the gifts of games, and applies them to political education." -Paste
"Your recent submission [...] failed during our review process due to a content policy violation." -Amazon Appstore
"This seems highly actionable." -NPR
Download
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Development log
- You Are Elon Musk now available!Mar 03, 2026
- Hey, I have a Patreon now!Oct 08, 2019
- Version 1.7 is live - small text revisionsSep 15, 2019
- Version 1.6 is now live - now you can track endings!Dec 20, 2018
- Version 1.5 is now liveDec 06, 2018
- Version 1.4 is now liveNov 17, 2018
- Version 1.3 is now liveOct 25, 2018
- Version 1.2 is now liveOct 24, 2018
Comments
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Yes! i. Spent. All. His. Fucking. Money. Only thing I really wished I could do that I couldn't was solve world hunger, but we'll try that with Musk!
Neither secret ending has a restart option, just a heads up. I revisited after playing Musk, love your work!
Now they do. Thanks! FTR, you can also rewind from the Credits page.
Any hints for the secret endings?
Try to get your money to 0 before you reach the subway.
Can you please add a way to restart the game from the true ending? Every other ending has a reset button at the end.
Huh, I actually didn't notice I missed that. It's updated now!
Best Game EVER !
monthly girls nozaki kun mention!!!
I got really high one night, googled "oh my god its a simulation im ending it" and wound up here. Convinced me I was actually Jeff Bezos and also god. Thanks. 12/10
this is so peak
ah yes, twitter, not x, it is called twitter
That was absolute peak
i love it but it makes me a bit depressed lol
peak game #BezosIsBae (also the true ending is definitely horrifying)
Hello! My name is Jen Bourke, reaching out with Boshi’s Place in NYC. I am hoping to showcase this game at an upcoming event to get prople excited to vote for Zohran Mamdani. May I please show this game the afternoon of the 23rd? Thank you!!
You may! You and Mr. Mamdani have my full support.
peak game lol
Excellent for a rushed game. I’d love to see it updated.
this was awesome, short and to the point. love every option that it gives you to spend the money
THIS FRIED MEE waking up as elon musk was horrifying th
Awesome
Getting a game like this rejected by the Amazon Appstore is baller
NOOOOOOO I DONT WANNA BE ELON MUSKKKKKKKKK
SHIPME-
This game is so awesome and funny. But what did you use to make it? I'd love to make my own!
try twine! it’s very beginner friendly!
Thanks! i'll try it!
Informative and joyous ! Literally the best game I have ever played. Radicalising my nephew to the socialist left was a wonderful experience 10/10 would play again.
(kafkaesque opening if I've ever seen one)
This was a beautiful experience, I got the true ending! (truly horrifying to wake up as the other one lmfao)
Agreed. Once I got the true ending, I felt a strong urge to do the roman salute and placate right-wing grifters.
I suddenly felt like roleplaying as my own toddler on the internet and texting some new woman about having kids in a REALLY weird way...
grinded to get all the endings and i got them lets go :33 (also a okapi is so cute omg??? my fursona's a bat lolz)
please help on the secret endings! thanks!
Eldritch horror right there.
this game stabbed my mother and killed my dog. 10 elons out of 10
this was awesome
I have no clue as to how to get the secret endings
sameeee! did you ever figure it out?
Just gave up on downloading it on my phone
Wait I thought this was referring to another game MB
I still didn't figure it out
no worries! thanks for your time!
Haha, it's time to spend Elon Musk's money now >:)
Wonder why its in horror section
Oh god I knew the corrupt bastard was rich but this is awful, he has all the power in the world to end poverty without even scraping the surface of his wealth. This is sickening
fr
This gotta be one of my favorite games on itch.io of all time. PLEASE make a sequel!!!
i love this :D please make more like it :D
<3
no gambling :((((((
I would absolutely love to see the sequels mentioned. This was fun to play!
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL i loved it
Twitter-brained writers are annoying. at least leftist irony bros can make me laugh. how does anyone enjoy this hamfisted attempt at comedy
You sound like fun at parties.
Idk man, that kid with oppositional defiance disorder can be pretty hilarious at parties.
This is nothing more than a simulation of the game creator's political fantasies and clear lack of understanding of how the world works.
It's called comedy...
It's very obviously just for a quick laugh and you shouldn't apply real world logic.
Are you a billionaire? Or are you in the majority of people who can only wish they had a billion dollars? This is not a political game, it never tried to be, it is just for fun, and honestly, if all you see when playing games is the hidden "agenda" then you shouldn't play games at all, or just keep your opinion to yourself. And even worse, if your just seeing all the other comments about how "political it is" and parroting them, maybe you should actually play the game. It is just one form of comedy amongst many.
sorry i cant read your comment over the billionaires dick in your mouth. go buy a house and tell me that a few people having billions of dollars to themselves is a good thing
I think we all need to calm down, I didn't see anything political about the game, just some attempts at humor, and poking fun at people who see political things in every game
I'm not responding to this comment thread anymore, as I would rather not be belittled
Being a billionaire *is* immoral, which is obvious to anyone who isn't a bootlicker. Quit being a crybaby over being told the truth lol